His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I touched a dick in church today
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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