my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
