Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
