Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
