If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
