I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize