last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
