There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
