Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
