So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
