I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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