shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
