'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
What did we do last night that was yellow?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
he was CRYING into my vagina
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
