Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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