Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
