I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
birth control should be required to get into college
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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