I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We left an ass print on the piano.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
