Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
