yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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