I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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