sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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