ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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