Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
