Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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