I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize