I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
