just tell him i said nine months
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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