yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
