dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
