if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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