Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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