I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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