we have officially lost it.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
