So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
