Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I love having hate sex.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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