She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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