i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
