The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
