The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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