How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
