Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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