You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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