The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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