Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
