She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
