I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
