I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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