got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You were trust falling into bushes
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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