Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
