Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
